Monday, September 17, 2012

Plastic Surgery Gone Wrong

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Joan Rivers in hospital after plastic surgeryCosmetic surgeons are making millions of dollars taking advantage of entertainers who don't know when to stop. Case in point – Joan Rivers. Evidently, Joan Rivers has had an astounding 739 plastic surgery procedures and, judging by her tortured face, 500 were done on her nose alone. Joan gave an interview to The Daily Telegraph saying "Every weekend I just go in and I do something new. I get a 10th one free. It's a little like coffee, you just keep going."

Dolly Parton and Kenny Rogers after plastic surgery Other notable entertainers who went too far are Michael Jackson, Burt Reynolds and Kenny Rogers, to name a few. There is no need to discuss Michael Jackson because we all know how he lost his nose, nor Burt because he's not important anymore, but I was surprised and disappointed when I recently saw a photograph of Kenny Rogers. He used to have a handsome, man-the-skip type of ruggedness about him and with his sexy eyes, he was a knockout. I watched a video of him singing with his old sidekick, but his face was so tight he had a hard time singing, let alone talking and mugging with old Dolly. It wasn’t Kenny Rogers anymore; it was some facsimile of Kenny Rogers. It wasn't the original Dolly either, but then, we've never seen the original Dolly.

Heidi Montag before and after plastic surgery Other disasters in the long list of plastic surgery overkill are those women that have received triple X breast implants such as Pamela Anderson, Katie Price and the directionally-challenged, Heidi Montag. Heidi is a fourth-tier reality star trying to get some attention who had multiple procedures done in one day, including a nose job, a chin reduction, neck liposuction, a buttock augmentation, waist liposuction, and breast enlargement, all with the aim of attaining 'inner' beauty. Any one of these procedures carries serious risk for bleeding, infection, scarring, nerve damage and adverse reactions to anesthesia. We wouldn't want to see an alcoholic drink two gallons of vodka a day, so why would anyone allow a surgeon to perform 10 procedures in one day on a 25-year-old?

As sorry as the above situations are, the woman who has everybody beat for the worst plastic surgery imaginable is Jocelyn Wildenstein, a.k.a. Cat Woman, a rich New York City socialite originally from Switzerland. Jocelyn was an attractive young woman who married billionaire Alec Wildenstein. Jocelyn Wildenstein bad plastic surgery She suspected a few years into her marriage that he was cheating on her, and knowing how much he loved his cats from his private jungle, she asked a plastic surgeon to give her catlike eyes in the hope of keeping him around for a few more months. However, upon seeing her after her surgery, Alec screamed and ran out the door and kept running, and Jocelyn returned for more plastic surgery to mend her broken heart. She is now in her seventies and still doing 'touch-ups.' What does she see when she looks in the mirror?
Jocelyn has had brow lifts, botox in her forehead, an upper and lower blepharoplasty, canthopexy, fat grafting, cheek implants, a mid-face lift, breast implants, lip plumping injections, a facelift and a chin augmentation. To date she has had approximately three million dollars worth of surgery, about five million dollars less than Joan, however. While passing through security at Los Angeles Airport, it was reported that Jocelyn gave the officers a terrible 'fright.' She also has a boyfriend who is almost 20 years younger. I wonder if he has ever been frightened. Can you imagine waking up to that every day and not being scared?

Although we have dissected and labeled every emotional and physiological disease known to man, I rarely have, if ever, seen the words 'illness' and 'plastic surgery' used in the same sentence. Perhaps it's time we start thinking of new reality television shows that every washed-up actor would be clamoring to be on for a second shot at fame. How about these shows: Plastic Surgery Rehab with Dr. Drew, Plastic Surgery Mishaps, Plastaholics Anonymous, Plastic Surgery Re-do, Dancing With The Plastic Surgery Stars, the Real Plastic Surgery Housewives (oh, that's been done already!), or Real Stories of the Plastic Surgeons. I would definitely tune in.