If ever I lose my job, I am going to start eating and eating and eating until I am 600 pounds, like this woman:
and if I'm lucky (bonus!) my hips will turn into something like this:
Then, I will create my own website and Paypal account and charge men an exorbitant amount of money to watch me in the nude as I fire down chocolate cakes, pizzas, cocoa pops and chocolate bars as I watch television and scratch the rashes under the greasy folds in my stomach. I might go kinky with pink stretch pants and a Lycra tank top. Watching as I bath or take a dump would be extra.
